IS IT REAL?

Story

This song came in the spring of 2018 at a time when most of my song titles included question marks at the end. It’s safe to say 2018 was a year of figuring things out for me. Including figuring out there’s nothing in life that needs to be figured out. But that’s a story for another time.

I’m no stranger to making drastic life decisions, and this song sums up the need I feel to seek more out of life. To dive so deep into it my ears feel like they’re gonna burst. It’s the perfect song for January because this is the month I move to Nashville after having lived my entire life in Atlanta.

One thing I love about travelling is learning the nature of a new city. Each one has its own personality, and it's no surprise that Nashville eats, sleeps, and breathes music. It's a level of commitment I admittedly have not given to music myself. Hence the move. If you know me, you know I've always got my fingers dangling in a dozen pots. Pies? Irons in fire? Whatever the analogy is, I do too many things. While that level of variety has given me a rich life filled with curiosity, it hasn't proven to be the best fuel for the creative career I desire. I want to be where the industry is. I want to surround myself with thousands of people doing the exact same thing I'm doing, but who are way more talented and way more hardworking than me. I want to have to fight to survive. You can't be courageous if you're not afraid, and I haven't been afraid in a long time. So it's time to put myself in harms way.

There's an innate accountability that comes with major life decisions. When you make them, you do so with strong intention. My intention with this move is to immerse myself in writing and performing. Not just music, but also my show Verses and other stories. Commit to expressing myself creatively with a level of intensity I haven't known. I want to know my limits. Not the limits I place on myself from decades of negative self-talk, but my true limits. I want to maximize my potential - like that old pair of sneakers you can't bring yourself to throw away. The ones you ran a thousand miles in, that have seen some shit (literally) and smell a little funny because of it. To paraphrase George Bernard Shaw, I want to be used up by life. This isn't about getting anything for myself. There's nothing missing. It's about giving myself over to my passions.

I'm terrified. I'm elated. I'm living.

LYRICS

by: Marshall Seese, Jr.

I don’t wanna spend the rest of my life
Chasing shadows in the night
Find your passion and follow your heart
Even when the damn thing falls apart

Is it real?
I don’t know where this is going
But I feel
I feel like something’s right
If I die
I’ll know that I died trying not to lose my mind

If you told me that it wouldn’t work out
And my feet won’t leave the ground
It wouldn’t change how I’m living my life
What’s the point in living a lie?

Is it real?
I don’t know where this is going
But I feel
I feel like something’s right
If I die
I’ll know that I died trying not to lose my mind
From all the news
I need a new excuse to go
I feel it in my soul

Is it real?
I don’t know where this is going
But I feel
I feel like something’s right
If I die
I’ll know that I died trying not to lose my mind